Build "Repo"

I have been called into my boss room to have a chat yesterday.

Prior to this i have been warned by one of my colleague that i should be aware (in which i did) of my subordinate's "small gesture" and i actually see this coming.

My boss is of the opinion that i am not "approachable" and hence cannot work together as a team. He said i should spend some time to have a drink with my subordinates on a Friday night to build my reputation among my subordinates.

The fact is, i don't think having a drink with my subordinates on a Friday night is part of my work. This should never be the only reason why my subordinates are able to "gel" (as in my boss terminology) with me.

I always thought that a certain distant need to be maintained between superior and subordinate. We are all employees of the same company and we received salary every month in exchange for work done. We are just doing our work, nothing more.

Am i the boss who own the company? No. Do i get anything more than my salary if my department is able to do more files? No. Then i am of no different from them except that i might ranked slightly higher than them with a room of my own.

Does that mean i need to hang out with them on a Friday night to build up my so-called "reputation" among my subordinates? I don't think so. We are all, in fact, sitting in the same sampan whereas my boss is sitting in a cruise. I don't think i am very different from them.

With this, it really gets me thinking... am i being employed to do sales and marketing (even among my subordinates), as opposed to clerical work? I never believe in colleague = friend. Colleague can never become friend because tension and conflict in workplace will always come between colleagues.

Maybe next time my boss should ask this question during an interview for my post: Do you drink? Do you hang out at pub during weekend?

Then my answer would be: I drink and hang out at pub occasionally but only with certain people in which i am comfortable with and people that i called "friend".

With this, i am not going to change myself just to please my subordinates because this is not something that i believe in. Different boss might have different way of dealing with people but what my boss advocating is definitely not something that i would do.